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  I don’t know how to set it. It almost looks dislocated. I tied it a sling with strips of my pale blue scrubs, which now comes up to my midriff.

  Sarah sniffles a little, "Em I'm so tired."

  I rub her arm, "I know. But we have to keep going. We'll be at the first camp in like a few hours. We will get food and a bath."

  Sarah looks defeated. She slumps and we continue walking. We look like the infected. We are covered in blood and dirt and our clothes are torn. We even walk like them. I'm going to be pissed if I walk all the way to the camp and end up getting shot.

  The forest grows dark. I would be scared if I had even an ounce of common sense left in me.

  I have a fever. I know I do. The chills of the soft breeze make my skin hurt. My head is no doubt infected from the filth on the bandage.

  I push myself on. One foot in front of the other. Anna is stumbling almost now. I have my arm around her and am pulling her up the hill. My legs burn. My chest aches. I'm coughing from the sickness starting inside of me. My body wants to fight the infection. It's strong from the weeks at the breeder camp but I'm exhausted.

  I feel my legs giving way and am about to collapse. My head lifts to the sky and I see an angel of mercy. He is pointing a gun at my head from a bird perch in a tree.

  "Halt."

  My dry throat barely makes out the slightest of words, "Help. Help us." I hear the croak of it.

  He is waving his arms suddenly. The forest comes alive. Torches are brought and arms reach out for me. Anna is gone. Someone is carrying her. Sarah stays at my side. I grab her arm firmly, "You're safe. Find Will and Jake."

  Her blue eyes fill with terror as I collapse. I feel fingers grabbing at me but their faces fuzz out. I slip into the darkness.

  I hear things. Sometimes it's Sarah and sometimes it's people laughing. I think they're laughing at Sarah. She never leaves my side as far as I can tell. My body isn’t ready to wake up. Something is withholding the waking world from me.

  Weird confessions float in the air around my head. Strange things like, "I should have killed you when I had the chance."

  "Emma I love you. Please be okay."

  "You saved her Em. You did it."

  I don’t know if the voices all belong to one person or if they are figments of my imagination. At one point Leo is beside me. He is reading a book sitting in a chair with glasses on. When I look at him he smiles his wolf smile and says, "You never should have left me Emma."

  The blackness takes me. It's like I'm on a roller coaster and we keep going in tunnels where I can hear but not see.

  I feel something bite into my arm and I scream awake. I'm sitting up and covered in cold sweat. My clothes are gone and a bandage is across my chest. No one is in the tent with me. I look at my arm and nothing is there.

  I feel a cold shiver. My arm still hurts. I can't help but wonder if it’s the ghosts of the dead girls. They're pinching me and telling me that I've slept long enough. It's time to wake and stop the breeder farms.

  I grab a robe next to my bed and pull it around me. I am thinner again. I sigh. All that eating was for nothing.

  I stumble out of the tent. My legs are weak. They feel like sticks. My feet are sore. I look at them surprised. They're covered in bandages. I lift my foot and touch the bandages. My feet sting.

  "You were bleeding from everywhere."

  I look up to see Will sitting outside of my tent on a chair.

  His eyes meet mine and I feel like he knows everything. He can see my soul.

  I put my fingers up to my head and wince when I touch the thick bandage I find there.

  He stands and walks to me. His body towers over mine.

  "You made it back." His words are a whisper suddenly. It's as if he was terrified he would never speak the words and even now they scare him.

  I nod once and try to fight the tears that fill my eyes.

  He wraps his body around mine and lifts me into him. I feel like it's the safest place I've ever been in my life. My father, my grandparents, my mother, no one has ever made me feel like I do in his arms. It's the safest place in the world.

  "You never do that to me again Emma." His words sound wet in the crook of my neck. He's trembling. "You never do that again."

  I shake my head. I can never leave him again.

  My legs buckle. Partly from lack of strength and partly because I'm emotional. I don’t know where to put all of the emotions. They're everywhere.

  He compensates for my lack of strength. His strength becomes mine. He holds me up.

  I sob. I sob for the women and girls in the black bags. I cry for the people who have no idea what's going on. The ones who think they're family members are living in a condo and have forgotten about them. Children who have been left to believe their own mothers are living it up with air conditioning in the city, instead of suffering in the woods with them.

  I sob because a small shallow part of me misses the food. I will never eat like that again.

  I sob because a doctor took my virginity. When Anna explained what had happened to us both, I never cried then. I was strong for Sarah. Now I cry for my loss.

  I sob because I never imagined in all my life I would be here in this moment. It's a dream come true.

  I feel other arms beginning to hug me. I feel fingers biting into me.

  "Emma." I know it's Sarah's voice.

  Will is holding me so tightly I can't see anyone. My face is buried in his massive chest. I am breathing him in. It's the sweetest air in the world.

  "Emma." I hear Anna scream and another body is crammed into the massive hug.

  I tap lightly on his chest. He lets me go a little but not completely. His eyes are red. I don’t see tears. He gives me his smile that makes my insides twist into knots. I turn away from him. His arms stay on my waist. I pull Anna and Sarah into me. We hug and shake.

  Sarah snuggles her way into my armpit.

  "You smell." She whispers. I laugh into Anna's mass of dark hair. Her and Sarah both look shiny and clean again.

  I look down at my dirty skin. "All that work to clean me up and I came back just as dirty as when I left."

  Jake walks up with his goofy grin, "I think you're dirtier." I feel Will holding my waist tightly, but I pull away and run to Jake. My robe is flapping. I pull it around me and hug him. His arms sweep me up into his embrace. He kisses my filthy face like he did the other time.

  "I missed you Em."

  "I missed you too."

  "Did you follow the broken branches?"

  I laugh in his chest, "Yeah. I did notice you left me nothing. Not a water bottle, nothing."

  He pulls me back, "We didn’t know where to put it." I look back at Will. He is smiling with his mouth, but his eyes are aflame. I hug Jake harder and ignore the flames in Will's eyes. I haven’t forgotten the girl in the micro shorts who mauled him like a bear. Or the fact he called me his friend. He has no right to feel slighted by me hugging Jake. I knew him first.

  Jake puts an arm around me, "So what's the plan?"

  I look at Will, "The other camp. The rest camp." I need to collect my wolf and my friend. I've been gone too long.

  Will nods, "Yup. Anna and Sarah should be there anyway. And probably Jake too."

  Jake's eyes narrow, "Hey!"

  Will smirks, "You have no capabilities here Jakey. You're still healing."

  "Anna how's your arm?" I ask.

  She moves it gingerly, "Dislocated. No biggie. Still sore but at least it's back in the socket." I gag. She laughs.

  Jake leans in and whispers, "Did you really miss both of us or just me?"

  I give him a shove.

  "We leave today."

  Will looks at me and stare for a second, "You sure?"

  I nod. He looks at Jake, "Get a couple back packs ready." He looks at Anna, "Go see Lisa at the big tent over there and find out if they have anything they need brought up with us." He looks at Sarah last and smiles, "You find out if any other kids need to come t
oo okay? Ask Marg at the far side."

  Everyone looks at each other and leaves.

  He looks at me, "You need to put some clothes on."

  I look down, "I need to clean up a bit."

  He takes my hand and starts through the crowds of people. I see people looking at me when they talk. I feel my face flush. His hand has eaten mine up. My arm burns slightly where he pulls it. We get to a tent with pails and a small hose coiled around the floor. He takes a white sheet and holds it up, "Okay, go hard."

  I raise an eyebrow.

  "The buckets on the right are clean water. Scrub yourself and I'll hold the sheet up so no one sees you."

  "I don’t want you to see me."

  He smirks, "I won't peek. I swear." I don’t trust the glint in his eyes.

  I hesitate for a second and decide I care less about him seeing me than I do about having the remnants of the garbage truck on me.

  I wince when I lift a small pale of water. It's cold but I can see straight to the bottom. It's clean. I pick up the soap off the shelf where it's dried. I can smell the lye. It stings my skin as I lather and start to scrub.

  "How bad was it?"

  I am trying not to fall over as I peel the bandages off my feet. The sores looked mostly healed. I scrub everything.

  "Bad." The lye stings the blisters on my feet. My eyes water. I rinse my feet quickly to get the soap off.

  "How bad."

  "What did Anna say?"

  He peeks over the sheet, "Nothing. Why the hell do you think I'm asking you?"

  I blush, "Hey turn away." I sigh and start scrubbing my arms and chest. I have to keep rinsing the soap because it gets caked easily in blood and filth.

  "It was scary bad. The place is so white that you feel like a ball of dust and dirt walking in there. The nurses and doctors are all shiny and clean. Like the fall never happened. They glisten and seem like they want to help you. The rooms are clean, the food is amazing."

  "Doesn’t sound too bad."

  I peek over the cloth, "It's not real. It's an illusion. They're fattening you for the slaughter. They get you pregnant three times and then they kill you. We rode out in body bags in a garbage truck full of dead women and girls."

  I watch his face. His lip curls into a sneer, "You're positive?"

  I nod, "The bags tore when we were scrambling in the truck trying to get away."

  His mouth betrays very little emotion but his eyes are full of it. I pour a pail over my body and rinse off. I don’t get my face wet and when I rinse my hair I tilt my head back. My arms tire easily from the scrubbing. I'm not looking forward to making the trip to the other camp. I force myself to focus on Leo and Meg.

  "Can you get Anna? I need my back cleaned." I don’t normally wash it, but I want every bit of the garbage truck off of me.

  "No. I'll do it." I want to argue but I don’t. I'm not sure why.

  I just try not to think as he bends and picks up the soap and a pail. I close my eyes. His hands drag the soap softly along my back and then the soap is gone. His fingers are creating heat trails up and down my spine where he touches me, bare skin to bare skin. His strong hands knead my shoulders, relaxing me.

  "Relax." He whispers into the tent. I don’t look at him. I ignore him and enjoy the feeling of another person touching me. I imagine my granny cleaning me.

  The cold water is shocking where he has touched my back. He tilts my head and rinses my hair again. My hands don’t move. They cover my breasts. I'm frozen like a statue.

  His huge hands stroke the long locks. I can feel myself thinking things, things I've read about.

  He squeezes my hair, "Emma what happened before with you and Jake."

  My stomach clenches.

  I feel a towel wrap around my hair and twisted up.

  I don’t turn and face him.

  He wraps a thick towel around my shoulders. I wrap myself quickly.

  He turns my shoulders, "Is that what you want? Do you want to be with my brother?"

  I shake my head and his eyes light up. I open my mouth to speak but he bends and presses his lips against mine. His kiss is soft but hungry. I push on his firm shoulders but his arms have pulled me into him. I finally get my face away from his and gasp, "I meant I don’t know what I want."

  His grip tightens. His blue eyes sparkle with anger, "You shook your head. That means no."

  I feel intimidated by him still. My lips tremble. I clutch the towel.

  His lips turn into a bright smile, "Don't look at me like that Emma. I can't be mad when you look like that."

  "Why are you mad at me?" I sniffle. I want to shout things at him. I don’t know how to be around him.

  He pulls me in again and kisses me softly. His hot breath makes me shiver again. "I'm not going to stop fighting for you."

  I nod into his face. "I need clothes."

  He kisses my forehead beside the bandage, "You need that tended to before we go."

  He walks to some huge trunks in the corner. He opens one and pulls out a pair of khaki pants with pockets on the sides and a long sleeve black t-shirt. He throws them at me.

  I miss my underwear and sports bra. I had kept it for years. I miss my mother's jewelry.

  I pull the t-shirt on and try not to notice the pain in my body.

  "You are black and blue you know that?"

  I look down for the first time and see my skin is all bruised.

  "I was clean and shiny. My hair was glossy."

  He nods, "I saw the girls at the breeder camps. They looked like people did, before." I wiggle into the pants without revealing my naked body to him. That doesn’t stop him from watching.

  His blue eyes are scaring me.

  Anna pokes her head in and smiles, "You guys ready?"

  Will speaks but doesn’t take his eyes off of me, "Yeah, just need Emma's head re-bandaged."

  Her grin is annoying. I glare at her. She puts a hand out for me, "Come on, I know the way." I give him a wide birth and take her hand. I look back at him watching me like a predator.

  She smiles, but I frown. "He scares me."

  She laughs, "He is different. Let me tell you. He used to be such a dork." I grip her hands tightly.

  An hour later, a new bandage, and a shot for tetanus and antibiotics and we are on our way. I chew a leg of turkey Jake found for me. I gobbled a bowl of oats when the first aid guy was redoing my bandages. Sarah has apparently eaten them out of house and home. I tried to explain she is used to a lot more food. That earned me a cruel grimace from the cook.

  The trail doesn’t seem familiar. I see the broken branches and want to smile but I don’t. I touch one with the tip of my turkey free hand and glance back at Jake. He grins and winks at me. He's so easy to be around. I love his carefree smile and worry free ways.

  I slow down and toss the turkey leg into the bush. I miss Leo. He would have eaten it.

  "How the head?"

  I look at Jake who's waiting for me.

  "Good. Sore. How's the leg?"

  He nods in the direction of the turkey leg, "Better than the turkeys." I laugh. Meg is going to love Jake. I know this.

  "Did you miss me?" He asked and nudges my shoulder. I feel my face light up instantly.

  I nudge him back, "Yeah. I missed everything. Anna missed you a lot. She was pretty excited when I told her you made it to the camp."

  He nudges me back, "I missed you."

  I feel my lips curl up into a smile, "I miss Leo."

  He laughs his hearty loud laugh that will one day get us all killed, "I miss that wolf more than I missed my own brother." I see Will's eyes glance back at us. He doesn’t look impressed, "Hurry up you two."

  Jake laughs again and nudges me harder, "I think he likes you."

  I smirk, "I think he likes girls in general. Did you meet the one in the tiny shorts and barely there tank top?"

  Jake laughs, "I did. She is uhm, interesting. She's a masseuse actually."

  I raise an eyebrow, "What's that?"


  He snorts, "She rubs your skin to relax you. It's called a massage."

  I roll my eyes, "Big shocker there. I know about massages. I just never knew the people who did them were called that." I think about her touching Jake or Will and I want to stab her in her pretty blue eyes with a fork or a spear, which ever was on hand. Hopefully the spear.

  "Did you get a massage?" I ask.

  He laughs, "No I saw the line up of dudes going in and decided to wait for you to come back."

  The smile on his face makes me feel like we are the only two people in the world.

  I bet Will has had a few massages. I want to break things. Instead I focus on Jake and a funny story he tells me about killing the turkeys.

  Will is making a fire when Jake and I crest the hill. Sarah is helping him and listening to every word he says. Kids love Will. It's weird. The little white haired swine who attacked Leo liked Will too. Thinking about the little brat at the camp makes my skin crawl. I'm grateful Sarah is a good kid. Her and Meg are my kind of kids. Not really kids but still young enough to be called a kid.

  Will gets the fire going quickly.

  I take my bow and quiver that he kept safe for me while I was away, and head into the forest.

  The quiet of the forest fills me. I relax and feel the bow in my hands. Everything is relaxing. I can feel the tension leaving my shoulders as I roll them a few times. I pull out an arrow and pull it back. I hold it taut and ignore the pain in my arms or the tremble of my line.

  I listen. I hear a crack on the forest to the right. I see something beige. I hold my breath and narrow my eyes. I see the tail of a huge cougar. It's a female. I don’t kill cougars. I don’t kill cats. It's a rule I have.

  I wait for it to leave the area. I know nothing is going to move or make a sound while it's there. It stops and looks at me for a minute.

  It's beautiful eyes meet mine and we stare for a second. It sees the bow and leaves.

  After about a half an hour of just listening to the forest I hear another noise, beyond the birds that have returned. I pull the arrow and wait. I see a spike deer. It's more meat than we can eat but it will be good to bring meat to dry into venison jerky. I focus on its soft brown eye. When it takes its next step it senses me. It turns its head and instantly the arrow is let fly. The arrow pierces the eyeball and the deer drops. I wait a few seconds. Just in case. Nothing moves beyond the odd twitch of the deer.